ForReal Friends

People always say you are the sum of your five closest friends. This phrase used to deeply bother me, and I could never figure out why. Over the past month, I realized why. Throught my freshman and sophmore year of High School I struggled with loneliness- not just "oh I want a boyfriend" loneliness, but "I am alone in the world" loneliness.  I began believing lies that I was telling myself such as "no one really cares about me" or "no one is like me". Friends, this was a scary time. I felt like I didn't have a place in my school or dance studio.

While I had individual friends at school and Church, I felt that I had to be a part of a friend group at school in order to fit in. When a group of people finally accepted me, I knew I was in. I let my friend standards down and allowed the people that accepted me to determine who I was. Now this is not the story of how I fell off into the deep-end of doing drugs and partying, this about a spiritual change that slowly began to transform my charecter. I became negative and self-centered. I was willing to trash talk people in front of my friend group just to have something to add to the conversation. I convinced myself that I was doing the right thing because now I had a group. I thought that just because my friends and I weren't out doing "bad things" that that somehow made the situation healthy. 

  

Then I woke up. 

My very wise parents mentioned that I had changed. My dad told me that he didn't recognize me by the way that I talked. He said that my kind spirit was being encompassed by a rashness that was not in my nature. As any teenage girl would do, I dismissed his comments and tried to forget his words. The conversation began to settle into my conscience. Why had I changed? Then it dawned on me, I had begin to act like the people I was around. Now, the people I was around are NOT bad people at all, I simply aloud my own character to be defigned by their acceptance, and not what scripture defigns as good and just. 

"Therefore as God's chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and peace"- Colossians 3:12 NLT 

As summer rolled around, the the Lord convicted me of allowing my moral compass to be defigned by my friends rather than His truth. He also revealed some rad friends(some old and some new) who encourage me to persue Him daily. 

Friends, the people you spend your time with do have an impact on you. Don't settle for friends who pull you down or cause you to stumble in your walk with Christ. I am not telling you to drop all of your friends who don't read their Bible every day, because if that was the case, none of us would have any friends. However, the people you surround yourself with are either pulling you closer to God or pulling you away from Him. Also, YOU DO NOT NEED A FRIEND GROUP TO FIT IN. In fact, you may just have a few friends who you confide in and that is wonderful. Don't compare your friends to other people's friends. God has everyone of us on our own journeys for His glory. 

I am so grateful for the people God has placed in my life to encourage me and to mold me into a better person. If you don't have friends like this, I encourage you to pray about community and activley seek Christian community. God is so amazing, He connected me with a group of people at a church camp in Panama City Beach who have become like family! While it is extreamly important to have friends who you are reaching out to, you also need friends who are pouring into you spiritually. Take it from someone who spends a lot of time reaching out to others- if you don't have God-fearing friends holding you accountable for your actions and walking along side you, you will grow weary. 

This group was brought together at Bigstuf
Birmingham-Memphis

Talking about friends is tough, but it is really important to surround yourself with not just positive, but God fearing people. Being equally yolked with your closest friends helps you grow closer to Christ. Pray for iron-sharpens-iron friends and I assure you, friends, that God will provide. 

You are beautiful. You are royalty. You are loved.

Abbie and Anna Camille are two of my closest friends. Thy are my biggest encouragers and life coaches. 

Surround yourself with people who remind you of your value in Christ
This was my awesome team whom I served with at SOS with in Memphis, TN